


A Bridge Too Far

by ultimaromanorum



Category: Assassin's Creed
Genre: (also an autobiography), Gen, Leaning on the Fourth Wall, a surprising lack of Templars, passive agressive Italians (an autobiography), rebellious Animus use
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-29
Updated: 2013-09-29
Packaged: 2017-12-27 22:31:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 286
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/984369
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ultimaromanorum/pseuds/ultimaromanorum
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>All Desmond wants is to bounce on Lorenzo di Medici's bed.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Bridge Too Far

“Everything is permitted, right? So why not? It's not like Lorenzo will ever know.”

Crane’s voice crackled through the Animus. “I don’t know. Nobody coded for it. Go find your secret door. We don’t have all week.”

On her screen in the office, Ezio narrowed his eyes. Desmond was apparently out like a light in the chair beside the monitors, but his lips moved ever so slightly. “But I can jump off rooftops,” said the computer monitor.

Back in the Animus, a flurry of disembodied keyboard noises filled the air. Dammit. She was on speaker. There was a snort somewhere in the office.

“Not in the memories,” Hastings called, in the bored, drawling yell only ever mastered by the terminally educated and terminally English.

Ezio gestured at the empty air. “Neither is killing civilians, and I can do that.” He took up an oratorical stance on the polished desk and declaimed theatrically. “Yes, comrades, I can stab innocent men in the street, but jumping on the bed? That would destroy the fabric of society itself. It’s unthinkable. We can’t have that.” He sat down huffily on an overturned trunk. Desmond’s eyebrows knitted together almost imperceptibly. “I’m not leaving this room until you recode for it.”

“The bed doesn’t have springs in it! It won’t even bounce!”

“It seems to me that’s your problem.”

The thud of fist onto desktop. “I could desychronize you.”

“Oh no?”

A sigh. More keyboard noises. “Fine.”

“Don’t let him boss you.”

Crane spun her chair around. “What else do you recommend?” She turned back to her monitor. “Alright, asshole. You win. It’ll be a minute.”

Ezio crossed his arms and leaned back against the wall. “I can wait.”

Desmond smirked visibly.

**Author's Note:**

> I spent a ridiculous amount of time on that rescue mission ignoring my objective and failing to jump on the bed.


End file.
